


Memories

by TheSoundOfThunderstorms



Series: Nightmares [2]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Healing, Sequel to Nightmares, angsty, widowmaker recalls memories among other things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 16:29:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14168931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSoundOfThunderstorms/pseuds/TheSoundOfThunderstorms
Summary: Being left alone to her thoughts was a torture in its own.





	Memories

**Author's Note:**

> This is the sequel to my story Nightmares. If you haven't read it, I strongly suggest you do before reading this. In fact, even if you read it before, maybe consider reading it again? I cleaned it up a bit with some minor fixes. 
> 
> Special thanks to my beta metalwarrior22. 
> 
> Enjoy :)

Widowmaker sat in the dark, fingers busy with finding the cuts that littered her upper body. Her suit bunched around her waist so she could get better access to her wounds. The door sounded from behind and a low whistle filled the room soon after.

“What happened to you?” Warm fingers traced the gash running down Widowmaker’s back.

“Someone cut my line.” The moderate fall had Widowmaker landing in the middle of the construction site she was assigned to.

Widowmaker stopped searching for the rest of her injuries when she felt the cool press of disinfectant against her skin. She closed her eyes at the familiarity of Sombra’s touch.

Sombra hummed as she cleaned the gash that stretched from Widowmaker’s shoulder down to her lower back. “How much does it hurt?”

The cuts and scrapes didn’t hurt but she knew the effects of infection on her body. “It doesn’t.”

“Not even when it first happened?” The sheets shifted as Sombra sat down.

“It numbs away faster than my body can process it. A spasm and then nothing.”

“Basically, it tingles and fizzles out?”

“Essentially, yes.”

Sombra smiled, her warm hand cupping Widowmaker’s scraped cheek. “So, since it doesn’t hurt, I can’t kiss it better.”

“No,” the faux look of hurt covering Sombra’s face had her continuing the thought, “but you can still kiss me.”

A cheeky grin. “I’ll take it.” Sombra wrapped her arms around Widowmaker’s neck, leaning up to place a kiss on the injured cheek before meeting cold lips with her own.

A joyful laugh escaped from Sombra’s lips when Widowmaker pushed forward, pinning Sombra to the bed. She stared down into purple eyes, seeing warmth radiating from them. A tingling sensation blossomed in her chest. Barely there but it was all she needed.

She kissed Sombra again, chasing after the feeling that threatened to dissolve at any moment.

-

“How long?”

“I can’t say.”

Widowmaker stood stock-still in the hallway to the medbay. She presumed Gabriel and Moira were discussing Sombra when she overheard their conversation. Her legs refused to let her walk on in.

“You said you could do it.”

“I said it was theoretically possible. She was gone far longer than the maximum window of time.”

Gabriel sighed. “I don’t need theories right now.”

“I’ve never done this before. I’m only trying it because you asked me to.” Widowmaker could hear Moira tapping on a monitor. “I don’t know the full capabilities of the treatment, as I haven’t tested it yet, but her body is responding favorably. She’ll be able to forgo the breathing apparatus in a day’s time.”

The image of Sombra with a breathing tube strapped to her face and a mess of wires covering her body flashed into her mind. Over the past several months the picture stayed the same. The medbay would be quiet, save for the machine that breathed for Sombra, in the middle of the night. Widowmaker would sit there, sometimes for hours, watching the IV connected to Sombra’s arm slowly empty. The strangely colored liquid swirled in the bag all the while, almost as if it was alive.

“I’m doing the best I can. It’s yet to be seen how much of her brain function will return.”

“But she’ll breathe tomorrow.”

A pause. “Yes.”

“Then try harder.”

Moira gave a noise of acknowledgement. “What about Lacroix? Have you spoken to her yet?”

“She’s fine.”

“She’s fine or she’s not talking to you just like she won’t talk to me?”

Gabriel stayed quiet.

“Something happened during that assignment. It’s been months and she still refuses to speak on it.”

“It was a mistake.”

“Is that what she told you? A mistake?” Widowmaker could hear the ruffling of Moira’s lab coat. “Look where her mistake has us.”

Her fingers curled into a fist as she listened on. Widowmaker waited for Gabriel to answer, teeth clenched as memories of that night filtered in.

“It won’t happen again.”

“Because you spoke it into existence the problem just goes away? We both know how far empty words travel.”

“As far as I can tell, this was an isolated incident.” Another sigh. “But… I can talk to her again.”

Widowmaker didn’t wait to hear Moira’s response, her feet already taking her away from the medbay. She didn’t feel like talking. 

-

“I wanted to tell you that…” Sombra stopped her pacing and mumbling when she finally noticed Widowmaker standing in the doorway. “You’re here.” Her lips broke out in a grin.

“What did you want to say?”

“Huh?”

“What you were saying before.”

“Oh, you heard that?”

“Yes.”

Sombra took a deep breath and exhaled. “I’ll just say it then.” She ran a hand through her hair and smiled at Widowmaker. “I love you.”

You shouldn’t. A tingling blossomed in her chest as her thoughts refused to leave her lips. Widowmaker stepped all the way inside, letting the door close behind her. She grabbed Sombra’s hand, bringing it to her lips to kiss the warm skin. As much as she wanted to tell Sombra that she shouldn’t love her, another side of her wanted it so badly.

“I know that you might not feel that way, or more realistically, you can’t, but I wanted to let it out.” Her fingers tightened around Widowmaker’s. “And now I feel ridiculously happy.”

“I want it.”

Sombra blinked. “Want what?”

“Your love.”

Her smile got impossibly larger. “Yeah?”

“Yes.”

-

The dark halls echoed with her footsteps. Like most nights, Widowmaker found herself at the medbay again. It became her nightly ritual to sit by Sombra’s side, watching a machine breathe for her. This time, however, the tube was gone. Soft breathing accompanied the beeping of the heart monitor. Widowmaker sat down in her usual chair and watched the rise and fall of Sombra’s chest.

Her eyes drifted to the screen monitoring Sombra’s brain. The constant scanning showed that there still wasn’t much activity but it was better than before. Enough so Sombra could breathe on her own. Widowmaker’s eyes wandered again, landing on the IV full of the mysterious liquid. It moved on its own, creating small swirls of dark blue. The bag always seemed full every time she came.

Widowmaker stared for what seemed like eternity until something broke her new nightly routine. A murmur. Widowmaker looked to Sombra’s lips, observing how motionless they appeared until they finally moved again. An involuntary response. The scans showed that Sombra couldn’t have spoken. Widowmaker moved closer nonetheless, dragging the chair right next to the bed.

She reached out her hand, touching Sombra’s warm one. So slow, she clasped their fingers together, knowing how much it would make Sombra smile in the past. And she sat there, waiting for anything when she expected nothing.

A twitch. That’s all it was. Nothing more than a spasm. Regardless, her hand squeezed back, hoping to feel it again.

“You know Lacroix, there’s nothing against you visiting during the day.”

Widowmaker let go of Sombra’s hand, hiding the fact that she didn’t notice Moira’s approach. “I’m busy then.”

“I see.”

She watched Moira set up another IV. The same dark-blue liquid swirled in the dim light.

-

Widowmaker woke up in the middle of the night. Sombra was still asleep, their limbs still tangled together. Knowing she wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep, she tried to get up.

Sombra shifted in her sleep, instinctively holding Widowmaker tighter. “No, no, no,” she mumbled.

Muscles relaxing, Widowmaker complied and sank back into the bed. She listened to Sombra’s contented sigh and closed her eyes. If she tried, maybe she could get back to sleep.

A knock sounded on the door. 

Widowmaker turned over in her bed, she was alone. She blinked a few times seeing the same empty bed each time. The sheets fell to the mattress when she stood. She walked to the door and opened it. Gabriel stood on the other side.

“We need to talk.”

Widowmaker ignored him, putting on her slippers that were by the door. She brushed passed him.

“We can’t keep doing this.” Impatient footsteps sounded behind her.

“Doing what?” She knew the answer but asked anyway, knowing it would frustrate him.

“Pretending like nothing is wrong.”

“I told you what happened.”

“And we both know it’s bullshit.”

“Do what you want Gabriel, I don’t have any more answers for you.” They ended up in the kitchen. She reached for the terrible coffee they had on hand and started a brew.

Silence permeated in the air, coffee dripping into the pot filling the quiet until Gabriel spoke again. “Will it happen again?”

“No.” The coffee machine beeped and Widowmaker filled a mug of the hot liquid.

“And what happens if she recovers? Can you promise that mistake won’t happen again with her?”

She blinked. A shattering sound echoed in her mind. Her hands were trembling, nails digging into her palms. She looked down to the pieces of her mug littering the ground, to the coffee splattered against the far wall.

“It was a mistake.” Widowmaker left, leaving Gabriel with her mess.

-

Weeks later, sunlight filtered through the windows in the medbay. Half of Sombra’s bed was cast in bright light. Moira didn’t give Widowmaker a passing glance when she headed straight for it.

She stood off to the side this time, unsure how long she’d stay. Her hand reached out to give Sombra’s shoulder a light squeeze. Her eyes flitted to the small movement of Sombra’s hand that came with her touch. The fingers twitched spasmodically. She peered back to Sombra’s face and concentrated on the fast movement underneath heavy eyelids.

Everything happened in a blur.

Sombra’s eyes snapped open and she screamed.

Widowmaker felt one of Sombra’s hand latch onto her wrist, squeezing it tight. Sombra screamed without end, her raw shouting showing no signs of slowing down.

Tears ran down Sombra’s face, spilling between the fingers squeezing her skull. Her body trembled.

Moira walked over with a syringe, sticking the needle into Sombra’s arm. Sombra slumped back, her hand loosening on Widowmaker’s wrist as the drug spread through her system. The screaming stopped when Sombra fell unconscious.

“I did not anticipate that.” Moira inspected the plethora of monitors, scanning the screens for anything that could be affecting her patient. “I suspect it may have something to do with her implants.”

Widowmaker lifted her hand away from Sombra’s shoulder, noting the indents of Sombra’s fingers on her wrist. “Can you turn them off?”

“Not without removing them.” Moira sighed. “I may consider it if this persists for long. It could hinder her mental regeneration.”

-

The screaming lasted for another week. Widowmaker couldn’t recall exactly how many times Moira had to intervene with sedatives. It eventually came to a point where Sombra would stare at the far wall, eyes moving as if they were navigating the infrastructure of her mind.

Widowmaker visited late one afternoon, stopping at the entrance when she saw Sombra speaking to Moira. The conversation didn’t last long.

Moira walked away from the bed and approached Widowmaker.

“She doesn’t remember much. At this point in her treatment it is expected. If you are to speak with her, I would refrain from causing her any form of stress. It could hinder her progress.”

Widowmaker nodded, walking past Moira. She took a seat in the chair situated at the edge of the bed.

Sombra noticed her visitor immediately, purple eyes keeping track of Widowmaker. When it was made apparent that Widowmaker had no intentions of speaking, Sombra spoke instead.

“You’ve been here a couple of times.” Her voice sounded hoarse, months of disuse and a full week of screaming showing through.

An understatement but Widowmaker nodded her head yes regardless.

“Sorry about the… screaming.” She rubbed at the back of her neck. “Information overload. I saw too much too fast. Took me a bit to figure out how to slow it all down.”

Widowmaker nodded at the explanation.

“Thanks for visiting me… uh,” Sombra rubbed under her chin, “what’s your name?”

“Widowmaker.”

“Oh wow.” She blinked. “Sounds dangerous. Are you… dangerous?”

“Yes.”

She laughed. “Honestly, that’s kind of hot.”

Her lips tugged up at the familiar flirting. Even with no memory of who she was, Sombra was still Sombra. “And that sounds like exactly something you’d say.”

“Ah, really?” A grin spread on Sombra’s lips. “What, do I have a thing for you or something?”

“More or less.”

Another laugh. “Okay, let me guess. You’re actually my girlfriend and that’s why you’ve come to see me so much.”

Widowmaker’s lips set in a frown at Sombra’s words. She wasn’t sure where their relationship would stand if Sombra ever fully recovered her memory. “It’s complicated.”

Her answer didn’t seem to affect Sombra. “Complicated? So let’s see here…” Sombra rubbed under her chin again in thought. “I got it. You’re my complicated girlfriend.”

Something inside her didn’t want to deny it. She wanted everything back. The flirty quips. The wide smiles. The sleepy murmuring in the middle of the night. “Yes.”

“Well count me lucky.” Sombra’s grin somehow grew even wider, joyful surprise coloring her eyes all the while.

-

Sombra huffed as she sat on the rooftop. She sat next to Widowmaker, the both of them waiting for Sombra’s timer to go off.

“You’ll keep them off my back right?” She inhaled deeply, her breathing evening out as she exhaled.

“Yes.” One minute left on the timer. Widowmaker raised her rifle, focusing on where Sombra left her translocator. One minute until Sombra’s code overrode the total lockdown, until she went back in to get what they came for.

“I trust you.” Sombra stood up and stretched. “I trust you’re going to get me out of there alive.” She disappeared with a wave of a hand.

-

Sombra gritted her teeth. Her eyes avoided the needle sticking out of her arm.

“How’s your memory coming along Sombra?”

“I remember that I really like purple.” The needle came out and Sombra sighed in relief. “Is this stuff really going to help? As far as I can tell it’s liquid torture. It fucking burns coming in.”

“I developed this specifically to boost cognitive functionality. Give it time, your cells are still regenerating.” Moira typed something down on her tablet and turned away. “In the meantime, enjoy your lunch.” She left without another word.

Widowmaker watched as a medic placed a tray of food by Sombra’s bed and left. Sombra made no move to touch the food. “You need to eat.”

“If they brought me something that tastes good maybe I’d eat.”

Widowmaker sighed. She rolled her eyes at the excuse and pushed the food closer. “Eat.”

Sombra made a face at the food but took it anyway. She squeezed the fork between her fingers and stabbed the rectangular and beige block of food. The corner came off and Sombra scooped it up. She shoved the fork into her mouth and chewed. A sound of disgust left her mouth after she swallowed. “Nutrient bar my ass. This thing is slowly killing me.” Another forkful was heaved into her mouth. “I’d give my left arm for some mangoes.”

The IV bag hung half-full. Widowmaker noticed less and less of the swirling liquid was given to Sombra as the days went on. Sombra followed her line of sight, putting her fork down when her eyes landed on the IV.

“Do you know what this stuff is?” Fingers traced the IV line but made no move to tamper with it.

“No.”

“It feels like it has a mind of its own, like it’s alive.” Sombra picked up the remaining bit of her nutrient bar with her fingers and tossed it into her mouth. “Sometimes when I’m staring at the wall out of boredom I can feel it moving in my blood. A little creepy if you ask me.”

“Boredom? I didn’t know that ever applied to you.”

“I never get bored?” Sombra hummed in thought. “Oh! Maybe it’s because all the noise stopped.” She tapped the side of her head, feeling the implants buried beneath hair. “Last week I think I turned it off,” a laugh, “but I have no idea how to turn it back on.”

“You turned it off.”

“I guess.”

Widowmaker reached out, her fingers combing through hair to touch the implants on the side of Sombra’s head. They weren’t as warm as she remembered and the glow had dimmed. She pulled her hand back. “Is it quiet?”

“Yeah.”

“I want it to be quiet.” She spoke her prevailing thought into existence. Her mind hadn’t been quiet for months now.

“Something bothering you?”

As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she couldn’t deny the endless thoughts were affecting her. “Yes.”

Sombra extended a hand and lifted her blanket. “Stay with me for a bit longer then. It’s quiet here.”

She took Sombra’s hand without giving the offer a second thought.

-

“How do you sleep with them on?” Sombra’s warm head rested on her chest. Widowmaker ran her fingers along the glowing implants. Sombra hadn’t spoken for the last twenty minutes but Widowmaker was certain she was still awake.

“Mm,” long lashes fluttered against cold skin, “It’s like sleeping with the tv on. The noise is comforting.”

“You don’t want it to be quiet?” Widowmaker ran her finger along the warm, glowing implants along Sombra’s head.

“No.”

-

“I missed these so much.” Sombra shoved a slice of mango into her mouth, groaning in satisfaction as she chewed. Her smiling eyes landed on Widowmaker sitting in the chair next to her bed. “Thank you.” She kept eye contact with Widowmaker blinking a few times before her smile slowly fell. A tear ran down her face.

“Oh god.” Sombra raised a hand, squeezing her face tight. “Oh god.” She pushed away the container of fruit Widowmaker brought for her. Indiscernible noises escaped her lips and she tried to curl up in her bed.

Widowmaker stood up, slowly approaching the bed. Her knees hit the frame and she held a hand in the air. It hovered, unsure of what to do.

Sombra frantically pulled off the wires, ripping out the IV while fresh tears flowed freely down her cheeks. Alarms beeped as the readings alerted the staff.

Widowmaker watched the liquid from the IV spill onto the ground, a puddle forming around her shoes. Her hand fell limply to her side, unable to provide any comfort.

“What happened?” Moira suddenly appeared by the bed and inspected the monitors. She took in the torn wires and the dripping IV. “I see. Lacroix, if you could come back another time…” She didn’t finish her sentence as she opened a drawer and pulled out a syringe.

Widowmaker watched Moira reach out for Sombra’s arm. She roughly pulled the arm, not even entertaining the idea of struggling with Sombra. The needle slid smoothly in the captive arm and Sombra gasped.

Sombra gazed at Widowmaker one last time before consciousness left her.

Widowmaker came back later that night, stopping in the doorway when she saw Sombra talking to Gabriel. Her eyebrows were furrowed as she spoke.

Moira stood off to the side and typed onto her tablet the longer the conversation went on.

A loud ringing pierced through her mind when Sombra suddenly stopped talking. Purple eyes locked with hers and silence hung in the air. She backed up with Sombra’s unblinking stare.

Her feet moved on their own, taking her away from the medbay. Before long she was standing in her room, darkness covering every corner.

She leaned against the wall and stared into the blackness.

A knock sounded on the door, Gabriel’s voice carrying through.

“Open the door.”

She didn’t move.

Something hit the door. “I’m not leaving until you open this door.”

Her fingers twitched, lifting slightly to press against the touch pad.

Gabriel walked in and turned on the lights. He spotted her next to the door and sighed. “She told me what happened.”

“It was a mistake.”

“You stood there. You just watched.”

“It was a mistake.”

“You ignored her. She begged for help and you ignored her.” A scowl covered his face. “A mistake? You let her die.”

Her fist pounded against the wall. “It was a mistake for her to love me.”

“Why?”

No answer came. “She loved me and I let her die.” Her voice grew hoarse.

“Why?”

Widowmaker closed her eyes. She leaned her head against the wall and tried to think, tried to bring back her nightmares. “She was too important to me.”

“You let her die because she became important to you?”

“No.” A hot tear slid down her cheek.

“Because you developed feelings for her?”

“No.”

He sighed. “Until you can tell me why, stay away from her.”

Her eyes snapped open, watching Gabriel leave without another word.

-

Widowmaker ignored Gabriel, walking into the medbay in the middle of the night. Moira was leaning against a counter as she typed on her tablet.

“You’re not supposed to be here Lacroix.”

Widowmaker focused on Sombra on the far side of the room. She was staring out the window. “I want to see her.”

“And why’s that?”

She shoved past Moira, ignoring the question. Widowmaker had no idea what to do when she reached Sombra’s bed. All she knew was that she wanted Sombra to look at her. She pressed her hand to the bed.

“Don’t.”

Widowmaker withdrew her hand and took a step back. “You remember.”

A pained laugh filled the air. “How long were you going to sit there and pretend that nothing happened?”

Silence.

“How long were you going to pretend that you gave a damn about me?”

“I…”

“You what?” Sombra waited for Widowmaker to speak, laughing again when no words came. “Do you know Moira doesn’t know exactly what this stuff does?” She pointed to the swirling liquid in the IV. “I can feel it crawling around my blood and she just gives me more.” Tears ran down her face. “But this shit is what’s keeping me alive. I can’t say no, I can’t ask her to please stop because at this point no one knows what would happen.”

The tears flowed freely. Sombra took jagged breaths to try to calm down. “You know, I was happy when you came to visit because I wasn’t alone anymore. But then I remembered. I remembered what you did that night, what you didn’t do and I can’t for the life of me figure out why you’d come here.”

“I wanted…” The words resisted her with each attempt to speak. All she could do was watch Sombra’s eyes harden, her mouth forming into a line.

“Get out.” Sombra’s hands balled into fists. She pressed them hard against her thighs. “I don’t want to see you.”

Despite Sombra’s words, Widowmaker took a step closer.

“Don’t.”

Widowmaker looked to the ground, turning away a moment later. She walked past Moira who said nothing about the exchange between her and Sombra. When she got outside the medbay, she leaned against the wall, feeling her fingers clench together. She hit the wall without thinking much on it. Her fist repeatedly pounded against it, searching for the pain that continued to disappear.

“Lacroix.”

Widowmaker stopped. She unfurled her fingers, finally noticing the blood painting the wall.

Moira supported herself on the doorway to the medbay, her eyes taking in Widowmaker’s hand. “How are you feeling?”

A hot tear spilled from her eye and Widowmaker rushed to wipe it away. “I don’t.”

“I… see.” Moira straightened up and typed something on her tablet. “Perhaps it’s best you stay away as Gabriel suggested you do.”

Widowmaker nodded pointedly and left.

-

You’re scaring me.

Widowmaker examined the darkening sky with disinterest. There was nothing there to get scared. Her body screamed regardless. It screamed for her to act, to just look at Sombra. She counted in her head, expecting the urge to fade with each passing minute.

One minute.

Look.

Two minutes.

Look.

Three minutes.

Look at her.

A chill ran up her spine and she shivered at the scene before her. Sombra didn’t blink. Her lips were separated slightly as she lied there, unmoving.

Five minutes.

A droplet of water hit her cheek and Widowmaker felt an electric pulse roll across her skin. Sombra still didn’t move and the dream wouldn’t end.

Seven minutes.

You’re scaring me. Sombra’s voice echoed in her mind again. Her body trembled as she continued to wait.

Ten minutes.

Gabriel’s voice sounded in her ear. “What the hell is going on?”

She stepped forward, her boot stepping in the puddle of blood.

“Widowmaker.”

She lowered herself to the ground, knees touching the concrete. A trembling hand reached for Sombra, rain spotting her exposed skin.

“Answer me.”

A tear ran down her skin as Widowmaker touched Sombra’s warm face. “It was a mistake.”

-

The nightmares ended in her dreams months ago because every waking moment felt like one instead. Widowmaker had been left alone for weeks. No assignments, no mandatory screenings, nothing. She was left alone with her thoughts and she felt it was punishment enough.

She rarely left her room. The practice range and shower saw her the most.

The thoughts racing through her mind were far from quiet. They shouted and ran together. A coherent thought in one moment would get buried by disjointed voices in the next. Memories of everything she used to have smashed into each other reminding her every other second that it was gone, that she wanted it all back.

Maddening. Each time she tried to speak her thoughts her lips trembled and refused to utter a single word. For each feeling that threatened to burst from her mouth, her mind took a step back, numbing everything to oblivion. 

Widowmaker barely recognized when she stood up only acknowledging her own movements when the door opened, light flooding into her room. She walked aimlessly, no destination in mind. Except maybe she knew where she was going, where she intended to go from the start.

She didn’t fight it, already exhausted from her own thoughts. When the entrance to the medbay came into view, Widowmaker only stopped when she saw Sombra sitting in bed. She spoke to Gabriel, a million purple screens separating them.

Gabriel paused and turned to look at Widowmaker. He spoke something short and left Sombra’s bedside, heading straight for the entrance. He grabbed Widowmaker’s arm as soon as he reached her and pulled her outside.

“What are you doing here?”

A crack, enough to slip past the barrier her mind had in place. “I was scared.” She lowered her arm when Gabriel let go. “I was scared to lose her.”

“Because she was important to you.”

She nodded. “I had no fear,” it felt like she was floating, like she was watching someone else speak for her as she hovered from above, “but then she loved me. She made me feel something, everything.”

Gabriel closed his eyes and sighed. He stepped aside, unblocking the entrance. “Go.”

Her body surged forward, pushing her through the open door. She didn’t stop until she stood in front of Sombra’s bed.

“I thought I made it clear that I didn’t want to see you.”

The words formed on her tongue with no effort, clear thoughts finally filling her head. “I wanted to see you.”

Sombra laughed and closed the purple screens in front of her. “So she speaks.”

“I didn’t think it was real.”

The sheets crumpled as Sombra shifted to face Widowmaker. Her eyebrows were furrowed in confusion. “Didn’t think what was real?”

“When you died.”

The confusion on Sombra’s face intensified. “How?”

“I had nightmares. Every single one ended the same. You died every night for weeks on end.”

“You could have told me.”

“I didn’t know which moment with you was real.”

A tear streamed down Sombra’s face. “You didn’t know?” Her hands clutched at the sheets, squeezing them tight.

“It was all too much.” Her face felt hot and she had to clench her teeth to stop the tremoring in her jaw. “I couldn’t stand it so I made a compromise. I’d give you as much as I could whenever I could but I had to ignore everything else.”

“You ignored the nightmares.”

“Yes.”

“And when it was finally real, you thought it was a nightmare.”

“Yes.”

“And what do you want from me now that you finally decide to tell me all this?” Sombra’s fists trembled in the sheets.

Widowmaker’s voice barely sounded above a whisper. “I want it back. Your smile, your laugh, your love. I want everything back so badly that I’ll even take the nightmares.”

“You want it back so you can give up again.”

“I…” The words stung with each syllable.

“That’s what you did. You gave up.”

“Please.” A hot tear spilled out. It dripped from her face and hit her hand feeling like a burning coal. “You make me want and you make me feel. You make the endless thoughts go silent.”

“If I meant that much to you, then you would have tried.” Sombra’s voice strained out each word.

Widowmaker’s hands hit the floor, breaking the fall as her knees gave out. Scorching hot tears splashed the ground in slow droplets. Her body shook, quivering elbows barely propping her up.

“Get up.”

“I can’t.”

“Get. Up.” The words came out rough.

“I’m sorry.” The apology shuddered through cold lips. “I’m sorry.”

Shaking legs appeared in front of her, a grunt of pain following when Sombra put weight on them. She felt an arm wrap around her shoulders and then a tear-stained face came into view.

“I’m pissed and I’m hurt,” Sombra sucked in a breath, “but I can’t stand to see you like this.” Her hand rubbed against Widowmaker’s shoulder. “I laid there in bed for weeks on end hating you.” She laughed between the tears. “But you want to know something funny? I loved you so much that all my weeks of hating you couldn’t even scratch the surface.”

Sombra sat down and leaned against the bed. Her arm never left Widowmaker. “I wanted you to leave so I could focus on hating you because I knew, I knew, I couldn’t keep it up for long if you stayed.”

“You still love me.”

“Probably.” She chanced a grin when Widowmaker smiled at the joke. “Yeah, I do.”

The trembling stopped. Widowmaker sat up, crawling to the spot beside Sombra. “I’m sorry.”

“I heard.”

“What happens now?”

“Two things.” Sombra wiped the tears from her face. “One: You kiss me silly. I want to forget I was even mad at you for at least five minutes. Two: You carry me out of here with those strong arms of yours. I can’t walk and I don’t want to see this place for at least a day. I want Gabe to be calling me in a couple of hours so he can yell at me to come back.”

“Okay.”

Sombra held out a hand when Widowmaker tried to come closer. “There’s a three. I need you to talk to me. From here on out I want you to tell me everything that’s bothering you. Even if it’s just annoyance because someone stole your favorite booth in the shooting range. I don’t know if you know this but dying is scary as shit.”

“Okay.”

Sombra smiled and lowered her hand.

A couple seconds passed before Widowmaker leaned in again. Sombra’s lips were rough and chapped but she didn’t care. Everything had slowed, the loud thoughts finally quieting down as she kissed Sombra. Despite Sombra’s words, she wasn’t sure if she could have it all back but it was something and she held onto it tight.

 

 


End file.
